A Good Girl that Rebels against Rules and needs a reset button…

I’m only doing this because Theresa tagged me, and she is one of my favorite bloggers and online friends. Mostly I don’t post about awards, memes and tags because the more people that read this blog the more emails I get. That kind of attention is sooo time consuming. Although it’s nice to receive attention it is less nice when each gift (awards!) comes with expectations on me. Not really my favorite kind of gift. But time consuming as it is, writing is fun and I’ve made my list. It contains way more than six facts about me, way way too much info…

Facts you didn’t want to know about iHanna

1. I don’t like it when other people have expectations on what I should do or don’t do! I’m a rebel like that. I prefer to make up my own mind about when I should do what and how. At work I prefer to know what I should be before I have to do it and not be told “do this now”. I guess you could say I have a problem with direct orders. I think I would freak out in the military world. But on the other hand, it’s a mindset and I can go into auto pilot if I have to, it’s juts not what I prefer.

2. I’m consider myself a introvert, which is when you are more reserved, less outgoing, and less sociable than extroverts who seek excitement and adventure. Introverts does not mean asocial, even though they tend to have smaller circles of friends, and are less likely to thrive on making new social contacts. I read an article a few years back that said that being an introvert means that you recharge your batteries when you spend time alone! Reading that was such an aha-moment for me and I totally understood myself better now that I know that. I “get” why I’m sometimes so tired and I give myself what I need; some time sitting alone with a great book, knitting or my art! When I was younger I always thought of myself as shy, but I’m definitely not that. I’m outgoing, fun and love a good party, but when I’m low on energy I need time alone, that’s just how it is.

3. I have a difficult time stopping once I’ve started something, anything. This is because I’m a Nice Girl who does not Give Up. Is it the female way or is the way we’re brought up you think?
I feel like a little robot who has no STOP button, and the RESET button is something I haven’t yet found. I wish someone could ctrl+alt+delete me at times! Or at least my to-do-lists. Maybe I should check in with myself more often. Re-read my journals and just breath for example. And take a break every now and then. I don’t listen when my body (or my mind) says “Low energy, low energy” (something my brother used to say a lot when he was a kid, with a metallic computer voice). It is good to be stubborn in some situations but in others it is the road to disaster! I’m improving in some areas; like when I used to read a books and couldn’t stop! These days I stop reading when it’s time to go to sleep, and put away books I don’t find interesting enough (see below). To me this is the reason I get stuck so many times. I find myself in a situation and I stay there. I don’t give up continue in another direction. Not even when I know I’m in the wrong place.

4. Another thing we Good Girls does all the time is striving to excel and do better. Wanting to become more than we are now. Never being content with what we just accomplished. On to the next thing, and do it better this time! This blog is proof of my ability to give myself a simple little task (try to become a blogger) and then wanting to be the best ever (posting more often, writing longer posts and in general improving the look and feel of my blog). Then I continue even though I should maybe take a break right now. I have decided to take a blog break, a big one, starting January 1th next year (2009), and I’m happy about that. But as a Good Girl I feel I’m letting myself down at the same time. This is because I really really want to keep going. It seems easier to keep going than to stop and breath. So I need to practice “giving up” or saying no! As an example I can mention that I used to finish all books I started reading, even though the book was boring or badly written! I just wanted the feeling of accomplishment that I got when I had read the last page! But now I don’t do that any more. I’ve actually improved so that now I even feel good when I put a bad book away. Recently I’ve started to listen to several audio books that just didn’t “do it” for me, so I through them out of my iPod and continued on to new ones!

5. I have a inner rule about trying anything once! When I get a suggestion or opportunity to try something new, I will say yes (if it sounds interesting enough) and then just do it. This inner rule helps me do new things and go to new places even though I’m a introvert, a planner and a stay at home kind of gal. I think it is good for you to try new things. New things challenge who you think you are and they can present new possibilities and get you to think new thoughts. The only way to know for sure if You like it is to try it!

As this got to be “confession time” today I might as well continue to the last random fact that you shouldn’t know about me and get it over with…

6. I have do not balance things very well! It was a major goal for me this year, to achieve and find balance and to integrate exercise into my everyday life. That has failed miserably and I admit it! I still don’t know how to balance some areas of my life, exercise integration being the biggest “obstacle” to tackle. I yearn to become fit and to be that image I have in my mind, but I’m not getting there on my own. There is a constant fight inside my head where the Good Girl-me is not winning! The Good Girl says Get outside, take a walk today! and the lazy true (?) me always answers very polite Oh, what a great idea, thanks! I will do that later…, and later never comes around! What’s up with that? Here I do blame my upbringing but I should be enough grown up by now to see through this and do something about it. Or at least that was what I was hoping… now I’m not too sure. I’m glad that today is first Advent and that it’s only one month left of this year. I’m going to re-commit to do exercise in 2009 again, as well as put up new goals and more fun adventures to do!

That’s it for today!! No more confessions unless you spill it too!? You’re tagged if you’ve read all the way here! Go sit down and do some thinking. Search your own brain and pick some random facts, good or bad, about yourself. It’s healthy for ya!

Also let me know if you have any tips on how to become a better person in any of these areas! :-)

Image information: All the photos in todays post is from my diary. They are prepared spreads for daily writing with images that I have cut out from magazines or printed from the internet. Writing on top or around images is lots of fun, you should try it!